Tonight is a combination at Bunjo's: a short comedy set AND a roast of John, the owner, for his birthday. I'll post the actual set and/or video later. I just realized his astrological sign is Cancer, so I *might* decide to tell my "Little Crab" story.
Instead, though, I'll probably pick from the following (some of which aren't spelled out in detail below, but nearly all of which appeared earlier in this blog):
John
John really takes "human error" to a whole new level. Everybody makes mistakes sometimes, but John screws up ALL the time. And Julie says until he loses 50 pounds ALL he's gonna do is screw up.
If you've ever been to SeaWorld in Orlando, Florida, San Diego, California or San Antonio, Texas, you might have seen Shamu the Killer Whale. Now this may be too terrible to imagine, but John naked, washing his hair in the shower is like Shampoo the Killer Whale. He's like that killer whale movie Free Willy. John's willy MAY be free but he can only see it in the mirror. Sorry, yanks. "Willy" is a British term. Yanks, Willy. Yanks, Willy. That's what John does when he's alone. I'm surprised she puts up with him. Of course, endowed as he is, she doesn't have to put up with him very far.
Stage, Screen & TV
Shakespeare's King Henry the IVth of England as Johhny Weissmuller. "I've been offerred another Tarzan movie. One more into the breechcloth, dear friends, once more."
Cartoon legend Yogi Bear and company are now appearing at the Ashland Oregon Shakespeare festival, with Yogi Bear playing the title role in Julius Caesar. His last line, etc.
Cartoon Icon Bullwinkle the Moose in Lerner and Loewe's My Fair Lady. We join him Singing "On the street where you live."
Retired TV legend Howdy Doody now works for Kraft Foods, operating a giant Parmesan grating machine. Howdy grating.
History, Ancient & Modern
French philosopher Rene Descartes as a tuber. "I, sweet potato.
French philosopher Rene Descartes as a tropical fruit, holding a can of garbanzo beans. Some people know, etc.
Prehistoric 5th grade teacher to dinosaur student, "My what a big vocabulary you have. What kind of dinosaur are you?" A thesaurus.
5th grade teacher. Class, Do you know the alphabet song, ABCDEFGee? Do you know what uric acid is? LMNOP
Latest news!
3 weeks after the recall of refrigerated cookie dough, John Dunne as the US Food and Drug Administration, writing to the Nestle company. etc.
H1Ni swine flu is back in the news. 1Million US cases. The WHO has declared a pandemic and is no longer tracking individual cases, only clusters of them worldwide. Rush Limbaugh has fled the country and is broadcasting from an undisclosed location. I wonder where the swine flu.
Gender news
The reason Men are simple and Women are mysterious has been found. It has to do with our genitalia. A man has an exposed penis, but a woman has a hidden agenda.
a new chain of collagen injection studios has been announced. It will be called Angelina Jolip.
Closing
Porky Pig explaining to Petunia the extra appliance in a Paris bathroom.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment