This is how I closed my set at Tommy T's in Pleasanton, CA on July 6, 2009
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Monday, July 6, 2009
Tommy T's - July 6, 2009
That was ... interesting. 30 comics, 4 minutes each. Show ran from 7 to 10pm. Val was nice enough to give me a little time to set up the props (around 40 seconds), but I never quite got it right -- ended up struggling to use the graphics every time. Frustrating. She also didn't cut me off at 4 minutes. That was nice of her. I ran 6:20 AFTER the set-up time (7:00 total). Set was somewhat well received overall, but not nearly as well liked as several other acts (that were good enough to run on-time or under). I need more time discipline. Definitely. The last line (when I'm holding up the black vacuum hose), "I used to sleep with WHITE ho's" killed.
Friday, July 3, 2009
Bunjo's -- July 3, 2009 -- Planned and Delivered
[This is pretty close to the ACTUAL set]
Hello. Bunjo's. I AM Rich Orwell. How we doing tonight?
I know what Sarah Palin would say if she were here tonight. "From the parking lot, I can see Australia." Outback Steakhouse. [the club shares a parking lot with an Australia-themed Outback Steakhouse restaurant]
She's in the news again. She's resigning as Governor of Alaska, effective end of this month. No joke. No explanation. It could be she plans to run for the senate in 2010, or campaign for president in 2012, or my personal favorite, take care of a difficult pregnancy with another downs syndrome baby, tentatively named "Stump." I kid the governor. "Hey, Todd, Let's go Outback tonight."
I've been playing this "Where's Waldo?" book. (Here's the cover)
But I'm not very good. Maybe 'cause I've got Cataract surgery on Tuesday, I can never find Waldo. [sigh]
I think somebody has a voodoo doll -- first a needle in the left foot, and now the left eye.
FIVE weeks now since my last foot surgery and the pain is all gone. (yay!) I was taking Vicodin and Morphine. Now Available in the parking lot, or on my web site, controlled substances dot com.
Married 28 years on August 1st. and we're still semi-happy together. Very compatible. Both depressed all the time. If you wanna get us a gift, we're registered at Rite-Aid. We could use serving pieces for anti-depressants.
Don't tell my wife, but I'm planning a 5 day trip to South America.
By now you know about Mark Sanford, right? The Republican governor of South Carolina who disappeared for 5 days visiting his mistress in Argentina. His wife Jenny has reportedly already signed a book deal and I don't think she likes him very much. She hasn't written it yet, but she HAS chosen a title and cover art.
This is the woman from Argentina he's been seeing...
Carmen Sandiego
[note: the club is in a Chinese restaurant that serves Dim Sum daily -- if you don't know what "Dim Sum" is, Google it]
I hear they've got great Dim Sum here. [sing] Dim Sum enchanted evening. (from the musical "South Pacific", ladies and gentlemen.)
And can I sing or what? Maybe I'll go on America's Got Chutzpa.
What? Not many Jews? Lemme explain. Chutzpa. It's the Israeli Vespa. The Mafia likes to relax at the Chut-zpa. OK. seriously Chutzpa is a Greek island next to Lesbos, but everybody there has big balls.
Around the 4th of July, I always think about my ex-gf from 40 years ago. After we broke up, she became a hooker. I'm very proud. It's like I coached an amateur before she turned pro.
She's very patriotic. On the 4th of July she gives a free bj to any uniformed svcman she meets -- while humming the Star Spangled Banner. Makes 'em come to attention. Don't boo.
Actually, she likes any guy in uniform. Next year she'll be working the Boy Scout Jamboree. She gives GREAT merit badge.
I had a "Eureka" moment last week. Lemme explain. The California state motto is Eureka, what the guy said who discovered gold in 1849 (49 -- 49ers, right?) Greek for "I have found it." An "Aha" moment. Here's what *I* discovered. A man CAN have an orgasm without an erection. Very important at my age... Well, it wasn't really a Eureka moment [show vacuum hose]. I think it was a Hoover.
You've been a great audience. I'm Rich Orwell.
Hello. Bunjo's. I AM Rich Orwell. How we doing tonight?
I know what Sarah Palin would say if she were here tonight. "From the parking lot, I can see Australia." Outback Steakhouse. [the club shares a parking lot with an Australia-themed Outback Steakhouse restaurant]
She's in the news again. She's resigning as Governor of Alaska, effective end of this month. No joke. No explanation. It could be she plans to run for the senate in 2010, or campaign for president in 2012, or my personal favorite, take care of a difficult pregnancy with another downs syndrome baby, tentatively named "Stump." I kid the governor. "Hey, Todd, Let's go Outback tonight."
I've been playing this "Where's Waldo?" book. (Here's the cover)
But I'm not very good. Maybe 'cause I've got Cataract surgery on Tuesday, I can never find Waldo. [sigh] I think somebody has a voodoo doll -- first a needle in the left foot, and now the left eye.
FIVE weeks now since my last foot surgery and the pain is all gone. (yay!) I was taking Vicodin and Morphine. Now Available in the parking lot, or on my web site, controlled substances dot com.
Married 28 years on August 1st. and we're still semi-happy together. Very compatible. Both depressed all the time. If you wanna get us a gift, we're registered at Rite-Aid. We could use serving pieces for anti-depressants.
Don't tell my wife, but I'm planning a 5 day trip to South America.
By now you know about Mark Sanford, right? The Republican governor of South Carolina who disappeared for 5 days visiting his mistress in Argentina. His wife Jenny has reportedly already signed a book deal and I don't think she likes him very much. She hasn't written it yet, but she HAS chosen a title and cover art.
This is the woman from Argentina he's been seeing...
Carmen Sandiego
[note: the club is in a Chinese restaurant that serves Dim Sum daily -- if you don't know what "Dim Sum" is, Google it]
I hear they've got great Dim Sum here. [sing] Dim Sum enchanted evening. (from the musical "South Pacific", ladies and gentlemen.)
And can I sing or what? Maybe I'll go on America's Got Chutzpa.
What? Not many Jews? Lemme explain. Chutzpa. It's the Israeli Vespa. The Mafia likes to relax at the Chut-zpa. OK. seriously Chutzpa is a Greek island next to Lesbos, but everybody there has big balls.
Around the 4th of July, I always think about my ex-gf from 40 years ago. After we broke up, she became a hooker. I'm very proud. It's like I coached an amateur before she turned pro.
She's very patriotic. On the 4th of July she gives a free bj to any uniformed svcman she meets -- while humming the Star Spangled Banner. Makes 'em come to attention. Don't boo.
Actually, she likes any guy in uniform. Next year she'll be working the Boy Scout Jamboree. She gives GREAT merit badge.
I had a "Eureka" moment last week. Lemme explain. The California state motto is Eureka, what the guy said who discovered gold in 1849 (49 -- 49ers, right?) Greek for "I have found it." An "Aha" moment. Here's what *I* discovered. A man CAN have an orgasm without an erection. Very important at my age... Well, it wasn't really a Eureka moment [show vacuum hose]. I think it was a Hoover.
You've been a great audience. I'm Rich Orwell.
Bunjo's -- July 3, 2009
I had fun tonight at Bunjo's Comedy Club in Dublin.
My set was well-received -- getting laughs where I wanted and a few I hadn't anticipated. I also had to "ad lib" in a few spots and felt pretty good about my "think on my feet" skills. After all, I *am* a trained orator, right? LOL
There were a number of "first"s. This was the first time I made a digital video of a set (and the first time I used the enormously sexy "FlexPod Gripper" tripod I bought yesterday to hold the camera). This was also the first time I used VISUAL props. While I've used a Digital Recorder before ("At my age, getting lucky means I can find the car. My wife got me this."), tonight I had 3 graphics, printed on regular 8.5"x11" office paper, plus a short vacuum cleaner hose. This was also the first time in 5 weeks I performed without a cane. Finally, I realized looking at the video that this was one of the first times I bent over on stage. Scary-ugly, but I can live w/ it.
I'll need to increase the recording volume level next time and zoom in a lot, but the recording came out OK. I was worried about the relatively small artwork, even in a relatively small venue, but the audience seemed to see it OK (I described each aloud while holding it up). If I had the budget, of course, I'd blow them up to poster size for legibility. I'll post each one with the set script. The hose, as expected, killed.
As I often do, I'll post the set later. I need to see how transferable to the PC the video is -and- how to upload it to Blogger. I also need to see if I can punch up the volume.
[Update: The set appears above. I'm still not sure I can get the video uploaded.]
My set was well-received -- getting laughs where I wanted and a few I hadn't anticipated. I also had to "ad lib" in a few spots and felt pretty good about my "think on my feet" skills. After all, I *am* a trained orator, right? LOL
There were a number of "first"s. This was the first time I made a digital video of a set (and the first time I used the enormously sexy "FlexPod Gripper" tripod I bought yesterday to hold the camera). This was also the first time I used VISUAL props. While I've used a Digital Recorder before ("At my age, getting lucky means I can find the car. My wife got me this."), tonight I had 3 graphics, printed on regular 8.5"x11" office paper, plus a short vacuum cleaner hose. This was also the first time in 5 weeks I performed without a cane. Finally, I realized looking at the video that this was one of the first times I bent over on stage. Scary-ugly, but I can live w/ it.
I'll need to increase the recording volume level next time and zoom in a lot, but the recording came out OK. I was worried about the relatively small artwork, even in a relatively small venue, but the audience seemed to see it OK (I described each aloud while holding it up). If I had the budget, of course, I'd blow them up to poster size for legibility. I'll post each one with the set script. The hose, as expected, killed.
As I often do, I'll post the set later. I need to see how transferable to the PC the video is -and- how to upload it to Blogger. I also need to see if I can punch up the volume.
[Update: The set appears above. I'm still not sure I can get the video uploaded.]
Thursday, July 2, 2009
How Many Michael Jackson books?
Does Las Vegas have a "line" yet on how many books about Michael Jackson will be published within the next 6 months?
I figure there's 2 parents, 4 brothers, Latoya & Janet, all friends, nurses and doctors, and the 10 dancers recently hired for the England tour. Plus unauthorized biographies and theories about his possible illegal behavior.
I haven't even begun to scratch the surface.
I'm guessing 50, at least.
I figure there's 2 parents, 4 brothers, Latoya & Janet, all friends, nurses and doctors, and the 10 dancers recently hired for the England tour. Plus unauthorized biographies and theories about his possible illegal behavior.
I haven't even begun to scratch the surface.
I'm guessing 50, at least.
Perverseverance
This is one of my older art projects, based on the series of "uplifting" posters for corporate America.
It refers, of course, to my continuing battle to remain kinky.
It refers, of course, to my continuing battle to remain kinky.
Mark Sanford's Wife Signs Book Deal
Jenny Sanford, wife of Mark Sanford, the Republican governor of South Carolina who disappeared for 5 days while visiting his mistress in Argentina, is understandably upset.
She has reportedly already signed a book deal, citing the need to provide for herself and her 4 sons after the anticipated divorce. In the book she will "tell all" about her marriage.
While she hasn't yet written it, she HAS chosen a title and cover art. See below.
[BTW, I printed a copy of this & used it in my comedy set at Bunjo's on July 3rd.]
She has reportedly already signed a book deal, citing the need to provide for herself and her 4 sons after the anticipated divorce. In the book she will "tell all" about her marriage.
While she hasn't yet written it, she HAS chosen a title and cover art. See below.
[BTW, I printed a copy of this & used it in my comedy set at Bunjo's on July 3rd.]
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